My Wife Drinks Too Much - What Do I Do?

My Wife Drinks Too Much - What Do I Do?

It started with the weekends. Mostly Friday and Saturday nights. Then weekdays right before bed. However, it really began to cause problems when she drank in the mornings, meaning she was unable to make it to work or pick the kids up from school.

If you can admit my wife drinks too much, it is important to provide support and guidance to help her overcome this challenge. Continue reading to gain a clearer understanding on the signs of alcohol addiction, offering tips to help her moderate or stop drinking, and provide information on how to answer the stressful question is my wife an alcoholic?

Understanding Alcohol Addiction and if a Wife Drinks too Much

Alcohol addiction, also known as alcohol use disorder (AUD), is a chronic medical condition that can have lasting effects on both the body and mind. It is important to recognize that alcohol addiction is not a personal failing or a result of lack of willpower. Instead, it is a complex issue influenced by various factors, including genetics, environment, and personal experiences.

Signs of Alcohol Use Disorder

Recognizing the signs of alcohol use disorder is an essential first step in helping your wife. Some common signs you will see if your wife drinks too much, include:

  • Difficulty limiting the amount of alcohol consumed
  • Unsuccessful attempts to cut back on drinking
  • Spending a significant amount of time drinking or recovering from its effects
  • Cravings or strong urges to drink
  • Difficulty fulfilling responsibilities due to drinking
  • Continued alcohol use despite negative consequences
  • Giving up activities to drink more
  • Increased tolerance and the need to drink more to achieve the desired effect
  • Experiencing withdrawal symptoms when not drinking

It is important to note that experiencing a few of these signs does not necessarily indicate alcohol addiction. However, if your wife exhibits several of these signs on a regular basis and they cause distress or impairment, it may be indicative of a mild, moderate, or severe alcohol use disorder.

Approaching the Topic: Wife Drinks too Much

Broaching the topic “my wife drinks too much” with your spouse can be challenging, but it is crucial to approach the conversation with compassion, understanding, and empathy. Here are some tips to help you navigate this discussion:

  1. Choose the right time and place: Find a calm and private setting where both of you can talk openly without distractions.
  2. Be honest and non-judgmental: Express your concerns for her well-being and how her drinking affects you and your relationship. Avoid blaming or criticizing her.
  3. Use "I" statements: Share your feelings and observations using phrases like "I have noticed" or "I am worried" instead of making accusatory statements.
  4. Offer support: When the answer is yes to “is my wife an alcoholic”, let your wife know that you are there to support her and that you want to help her overcome her challenges with alcohol.
  5. Suggest professional help: If you feel that her drinking has become a significant issue, encourage her to seek professional treatment. Emphasize that seeking help is a sign of strength and not a sign of weakness.

Remember to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding, as your wife may be defensive or in denial about her alcohol use. It may take time for her to accept help, so be patient and continue to offer support throughout the process.

Helping Your Wife Moderate or Stop Drinking

If your wife wife can acknowledge the answer to “is my wife an alcoholic” there are several strategies you can implement together to support her on this journey. Here are some tips to help your wife moderate or stop drinking:

  • Keep a record: Encourage your wife to keep a journal of her drinking habits, including the types and amounts of alcohol consumed. This record can provide insights into her drinking patterns and help her recognize the negative consequences.
  • Set goals together: Work with your wife to set achievable goals, such as gradually reducing the number of drinks per week or abstaining from alcohol for a specific period. Support each other in achieving these goals.
  • Remove triggers: Minimize the presence of alcohol in your home by removing it or keeping it out of sight. Avoid social situations that revolve around heavy drinking, as they can act as triggers.
  • Find alternative activities: Encourage your wife to explore and engage in activities that do not involve alcohol. Plan outings, engage in hobbies together, or find new interests that can replace drinking.
  • Seek support: Encourage your wife to join support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or seek professional counseling. These resources provide a supportive community and valuable tools for recovery.

It is important to remember that moderation or complete abstinence from alcohol may not be achievable for everyone. The most crucial aspect is to support your wife in finding a healthy balance and addressing her alcohol use in a way that works best for her.

Seeking Professional Help

If your wife's alcohol use continues to be problematic or if she is unable to moderate or stop drinking despite your efforts, it may be necessary to seek professional help. Professional treatment can provide the necessary tools, support, and guidance for individuals struggling with alcohol addiction. Here are some signs that indicate the need for professional treatment:

  • Inability to control or stop drinking
  • Continued negative consequences related to alcohol use
  • Withdrawal symptoms when attempting to quit
  • Deterioration of physical and mental health
  • Strain on relationships and responsibilities

When considering professional treatment options, it is essential to research and choose a reputable facility or program that specializes in alcohol addiction. Treatment options may include inpatient rehabilitation, outpatient programs, support groups, counseling, and therapy.


Supporting your wife through her challenges with alcohol addiction requires empathy, understanding, and patience. By recognizing the signs of alcohol use disorder, approaching the topic with compassion, and offering support and guidance, you can help guide her towards a healthier and happier life. Remember that seeking professional help may be necessary in some cases, and there is no shame in reaching out for additional support. Together, you can navigate the journey if you have decided “yes, my wife drinks too much”.


Medical News Today- Giving up Alcohol May Significantly Boost Mental Health

Indiana Center for Recovery- Will Quitting Alcohol Improve My Mental Health?

Alcohol Change UK- Alcohol and Mental Health

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