What Does the Bible Say About Masturbating?

Masturbation is an intimidating topic, and with so few people willing to talk about it, it can be hard to discover what’s true and what isn’t.

The culture of the internet right now claims that masturbating is good for you—is that true? What does the Bible say?

You may be feeling confused, or even a little ashamed, but that’s okay. We’re here to discuss these big questions. Our goal here at Relay is not only to help you find what is true, but to help you find freedom from behaviors like this that might be bringing you stress and shame.

In this article, we’ll discuss what the Bible says about masturbating, as well as what research says, and at the end, we’ll discuss some resources that are available to you if you’ve found yourself trapped in a masturbation habit. (Spoiler alert: changing your behavior might not be easy, but with God on your side, it’s 100% doable!)

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What Today’s Culture Says About Masturbating

If you were to ask google if masturbating is bad for your body, you would be met with a ton of very official-looking articles detailing the supposed health benefits of this practice. They talk about the benefits of ‘getting to know your body’ and ‘exploring your pleasure and sexuality.’ It’s alluring language. And here’s the thing: maybe that’s true. (We’ll discuss these articles later on, and whether or not they’re actually true. So stay tuned!) Yet we Christians still stay away from masturbating. Why?

As believers in Christ, we strive to be like Him in our thoughts and actions. The Bible talks a lot about the “higher law” as taught by Jesus Christ. The laws of the Old Testament were known from things like “no killing, no adultery.” But when Jesus came, He taught us not just not to kill, but He said not even to react in anger to someone. Not only are we not to commit adultery, we are to try our best to avoid lustfulness altogether!

So why do we Christians say “no thank you” when the internet tries to teach that “exploring our pleasure and sexuality” is a good thing? We’re striving to be pure in our hearts and minds, like the Savior, Jesus Christ, is. The Bible teaches that sexuality is reserved for marriage (we’ll talk more on this later too), and so we do our best to follow that teaching. But what does the Bible really say about masturbating? Let’s dive in.

What Does the Bible say about Masturbating?

The tricky thing here is that the Bible never specifically mentions masturbation. Yep, you read that right. Nowhere does it say, “thou shalt not.” But do we really need a specific “thou shalt not” from God to know if we’re on the right track? Scripture mentions striving for purity, becoming sanctified, and avoiding lust, but the practice of masturbation itself is not specifically mentioned one time.

So what do we do?

I’ve noticed that when I’m wondering what the Bible says about something, the root of my concern isn’t actually finding Bible verses at all. I’m almost always wondering if that thing I’ve been doing is right or wrong.

This is where the Word of God can be incredibly helpful, as our Father in Heaven trusts us enough to provide us with scriptural guidelines, and then let us use our discernment to apply those guidelines in a modern world. That being said, we’ll go through a list of some applicable verses together, and see what we can discern from Scripture about the complex, nuanced topic of masturbating.

• Galatians 5:16 - So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.
• Colossians 3:5 - Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.
• James 1:14-15 - but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 - For it is God’s will that you should be holy: You must abstain from sexual immorality; each of you must know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in lustful passion like the Gentiles who do not know God…
• 2 Timothy 2:22 - Flee from youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, together with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

What Should We Learn From This?

So, lots of avoiding immoral or unholy desires, but not a word about masturbating. However, if God built our bodies to be capable of the powerful feelings of love and sexual desire, do we really think He would leave us in the dark as to how to best use them?

I don’t think so.

It’s clear from these verses that the Lord wants us to live lives of holiness, seeking after that which is good, and right, and will lead us to Him. Giving in to temptations that are labelled as “sexually immoral” or “passionate” does not help us achieve these goals of holiness that God has set for us. He wants to bless us, and we need to be living in a way that is consistent with what the Bible teaches in Galatians 5:16, Colossians 3:5, James 1:14-15, 2 Timothy 2:22, and 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 in order for God to be able to give us the blessings that come from following the commandments He has given us.

But does that mean that all “passion” is bad? No! Maybe you’re passionate about football, ballet, art, rock climbing, music, human rights, theatre, sports, or nature. These traits are God-given gifts, just like your sexuality is.

But imagine expressing your passion for football in the middle of a quiet yoga class. If you just jumped to your feet and started screaming “GO FIGHT WIN WIN! ROCKWOOD TIGERS DO IT AGAIN!” while the people around you were quietly stretching and meditating… that might not be the best idea. It’s important that we learn to express “self-love” and explore our sexuality in the right context. The Bible teaches us that the right context for this is within a Godly marriage. Just like you probably shouldn’t start reciting a Shakespearean monologue in the middle of a silent math exam—because that isn’t the right context—exploring your body’s sexual capabilities outside of marriage isn’t the right context either. It isn’t consistent with the holy and virtuous lifestyle you’re doing your best to live as a follower of Jesus Christ.

Now, do the verses about sexual passion above mean that having sexual passion towards your spouse a bad thing? Absolutely not! In marriage, sexuality is healthy and helpful. But exploring feelings of sexual passion alone is where we stumble into dangerous territory. Why?

Let’s talk about it.

What Are the Effects of Masturbating?

You’ve probably seen the now-debunked lists of masturbation’s side effects (ie, you’ll go blind, you’ll get hair on the palms of your hands, weird stuff). These were probably used in the past as scare tactics to keep young people from masturbating as they underwent puberty and sexual development. They’re just not accurate.

However, there are some side effects that are real, and contribute to why so many Christians feel so strongly that masturbating is wrong.

Masturbating and Pornography

Masturbation has a very strong tie to pornography use. Seeking out pornography is a common reaction to feelings of physical arousal, watching sexually explicit content online so that the body can be aroused enough to achieve orgasm. Pornography is bad. Toxic, even. There are many reasons why pornography is incredibly psychologically harmful in both the long and short term, but that goes beyond the topic of this article (although you can read more about it here).

But there are side effects of masturbation that aren’t linked to pornography.

Masturbating and the Shame-Isolation Cycle

Whenever we are doing something that is inconsistent with our beliefs, it creates feelings of guilt. Guilt can be the Holy Spirit’s way of telling us that we’ve done (or are doing) something that is wrong. Praying to God in repentance and asking Him to forgive you for masturbating in the past, and help you to break out of this habit in the future can help that guilt to go away.

But sometimes that’s a very scary prayer to pray. So we put it off.

When we allow guilt to keep us from doing the things that we know will help us, the Devil can take that guilt and twist it into shame. Shame is very negative.

Shame does not lead us to repent. It leads us to hide, and isolate ourselves from our families, friends, and church groups.

The cycle is vicious. We feel guilty that we masturbated, we feel ashamed and don’t want anyone to find out, we withdraw from the people who love and care about us, we feel isolated and alone, and in isolation it becomes much easier to give in to temptations to do things like masturbate again. Then we feel even worse, isolate ourselves even more, and the cycle continues.

Masturbation is Habit-Forming

One of the other side effects of masturbation is the likelihood of falling into a habit. This kind of habit can be controlling and negative, and can make us feel powerless against temptation, seeing our body and our sexuality as something negative, instead of the gift from God that these things truly are.

Is Masturbating Healthy?

You can find studies that say that masturbating is healthy. People are still generally uncomfortable with the idea of masturbation, so it hasn’t been studied much. But there have been a handful of studies that seem to make a good point when they say that people who have frequent orgasms tend to be healthier and live longer.

But, there’s an error in most of these studies. They weren’t actually specifically studying masturbation or orgasms that came from self-stimulation like masturbating to a pornographic video. They were just studying people generally, and found that those who had regular orgasms were healthier. Why should this raise our suspicion? Many of the people included in these studies were actually in committed, loving relationships and marriages where sex was simply a fun part of their lives together. Of course these people would be healthier and live longer.

(If you find stuff like this interesting, check out this interview with Dr. Dean Busby, an LMFT specializing in healthy sexuality.)

Here’s the thing. In 1 Peter 2:9, Jesus’s beloved apostle Peter teaches that we are supposed to be a “peculiar people.” We Christians are different from the world. So if the internet tells you that masturbating is good and healthy, but you feel awful, guilty, ashamed when you do it, listen to your feelings. We know that the Holy Spirit can speak to our feelings, and so these probably come from God.

No matter what the internet may say, no matter how official it may look and sound, a habit of masturbating goes against the lifestyle of virtue that Jesus Christ teaches us to strive for in the Bible.

How Do I Overcome Urges to Masturbate?

This is a fantastic and very vulnerable question. So if it’s been on your mind, give yourself a pat on the back for being aware of your emotions and connected to yourself. These are both very healthy things!

Resources

There are several resources available to you. Remember that it’s okay to experience feelings of arousal—later on in life, as you learn to manage them, they can serve you well! This link will take you to a podcast about how to mindfully feel the desire to masturbate or watch pornography, but not give in to it.

If you feel like you’ve developed a real masturbation habit, that can feel intimidating. But don’t give up on yourself. It might be time to talk to those in your life who love and care about you.

If you are blessed to have parents/a spouse with whom you feel safe and comfortable, it might be a good idea to have a conversation with them, and ask them for help with your goals to become more pure and Christlike. Remember that you can tell them as much or as little as you feel ready to. In a healthy family, they’ll understand that you might need time to process some things before you say them out loud (you might need to remind them of this). And that’s okay.

If you feel comfortable and safe with your pastor, youth group leader, men/women’s group leader, Sunday school teacher, or even just a mature friend, they can be valuable resources as you work towards living a more positive and chaste lifestyle. Odds are, their body has undergone sexual development too, and they can probably relate to you more than you might expect.

But it’s okay if you don’t feel ready to have these conversations. It’s an intimidating topic, even for the most mature of adults.

If you aren’t ready to talk to someone face to face yet, online support groups can be an awesome resource with which to get to work on your recovery. We at Relay have created one where you get matched into a group of others who understand your struggle, and work together to reach your goals. I love the system we’ve built, and hope that you will find it helpful in your recovery, too.

Your Most Important Resource

Through all of this, don’t forget which team you play for. If you’re the type of person who was searching what the Bible has to say about masturbation, it means that you care what God thinks about you.

The message of God and Jesus is one of joy and forgiveness for those who believe and repent. Talking to God about masturbating might feel scary or embarrassing, but I promise that He wants to hear from you. You’re His kid! He loves you. Praying for help, strength, and forgiveness can be a powerful experience. But if you don’t feel ready for that, maybe just ask Him how He feels about you. I promise He’ll answer in love.

Remember what the Bible says in Romans 8:31. “If God be for us, who can be against us?” Isn’t that neat?! You’re on the same team as someone who is literally invincible. And what has He promised you?

In Isaiah 41:10, God says, “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”

God has promised to help you. I’ll let you in on a secret: Changing your behavior isn’t easy. Masturbation does things to the brain that can take awhile to unlearn. But if you have God on your side, no matter how hard quitting may seem, it is doable.

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