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We have all heard the old wives’ tales about masturbating too much: that you’ll get hairy palms, that you’ll go blind, that your genitals will somehow shrink. We’ve also heard, on the flip side, the benefits of masturbation.
As we grew up and no longer believed that our grandmothers were staring at us from heaven, judging our every move, and we realized that the hairy palms just weren’t happening, we have come to believe that masturbation is good for us; good for our health, prostate, mental wellbeing, etc. And this is true!
However, some people do experience negative feelings about masturbation, and this is where troubles can arise. People who feel guilt or shame about masturbation, or spend significant amounts of time watching porn, might find that refraining from it for a while in favor of other activities can enhance their lives and overall health.
Is Masturbation Bad for You?
From a physiological standpoint, the simple answer is no. Masturbation is a perfectly normal activity that does indeed have some measurable health benefits.
For males, some studies suggest that regular ejaculation, whether by masturbation or intercourse, can have health benefits, including reducing the chances of getting prostate cancer. Another study found that masturbation and sex boost serotonin, which is a great way to catch up on sleep.
For females, orgasm can soothe menstrual cramps, as it causes the muscles around the uterus to contract and relax. All in all, masturbation (and sex in general) is a safe, healthy behavior when done in moderation and with regularity.
However, there are a lot of societal, religious, and moral hang-ups when it comes to the act of masturbation. Because of this, many people have negative emotions that surround the behavior.
In addition, it’s possible to have too much of a good thing. If you are masturbating too much, there can be some negative side effects:
- Guilt: Some people feel extreme guilt about masturbating because of spiritual, religious, or cultural beliefs.
- Decrease in sexual sensitivity: Masturbating too much might make it more difficult for you to reach orgasm over time, especially orgasm with another partner.
- Edema: In extreme cases, some males can develop swelling from masturbating too much or for long periods.
- Dependency: Some people can become addicted, at least psychologically, to the behavior of masturbation.
What Makes Masturbation So Addicting?
We don’t buy into the whole theory that certain people have addictive personalities and certain people do not. The bottom line is that some substances and behaviors are just addictive in nature.
Any of us could become an alcoholic. Any of us could become addicted to porn. Any of us could make a few wrong choices that would send us down an unfavorable path.
When it comes to masturbation, it’s biology, baby. Of course, we all know that human beings crave sex, but we also crave connection. When we feel connected with an activity, we tend to want to repeat it.
Many people who enjoy masturbating have rituals that go along with it, whether explicitly planned or not. These rituals become a form of comfort that we look forward to. However, sometimes those rituals can be harmful, especially if they involve excessive internet porn.
Because porn and masturbation often go hand in hand, this connection is worth noting. Pornography specifically is designed to be addictive, and it leaves the viewer always wanting more.
Most people who regularly watch porn will increase their desire for it over time and will also increase the amount, frequency, and extreme nature of what they’re watching.
If either or both become the type of activity that causes your relationships suffer, your career to be impacted negatively, or your self-confidence to waver, then you may need to look into making a change.
What Are Some Benefits of Not Masturbating?
If you are ready to make a change in your life and see what a little masturbation celibacy is all about, check out some of these benefits that might just surprise you.
Increased Happiness
Many people believe that when they stop masturbating, their overall happiness increases. While there are several reasons why this is possible, a big part of it probably has to do with a decrease in the guilt and shame they felt before stopping. Often it isn’t the act itself that needs a shift, but the belief system surrounding it.
Reduced Anxiety
It is common for people to masturbate to relieve stress and anxiety. Ironically, the act often ends up actually increasing their anxiety. Abstaining from masturbation can help individuals to take back control over their lives.
Escaping from compulsive or addictive behaviors can ease anxiety and make you feel like you are the one in the driver’s seat.
Better Focus
If you’re old enough to remember the Seinfeld episode in which the characters all practice complete celibacy as part of a bet, you’ll remember that the male characters in the show all felt as though a veil had been lifted and that they could suddenly focus on the world around them without the veneer of sexuality covering everything.
While this was clearly a joke, there’s some truth to it. Believe it or not, masturbation can interfere with daily life for some people, and stopping the act can improve focus and drive.
More Energy
This one is a little tricky, and it’s important to remember that correlation and causation are different. When someone stops masturbating, if they were doing it excessively before, it sets off a chain reaction.
If that person was staying up late to watch porn and is now going to bed at a reasonable hour, it stands to reason they’d report higher energy levels. However, it’s also true that, especially in males, if someone is depleting testosterone levels and semen supply constantly, this can drain energy.
Not to mention, time spent masturbating is time not spent doing things that reportedly increase energy, such as mediation, exercise, and getting outside.
Improved Relationships
This has got to be the number one reason to quit or at least cut down on masturbating. It’s tough to maintain a healthy relationship if you are living with guilt or doing something secretive that you don’t want the other person to know about.
Masturbating while watching porn also sets people up for unrealistic expectations around sex, so the less of that in your life, the better!
Discipline and Willpower
If you’ve never heard of the (comically named) NoFap movement, it’s worth looking into. Proponents of this movement claim that quitting masturbating has helped them become better versions of themselves. For many, masturbation abstinence is seen as a test of willpower and a way of learning discipline.
Many say that this discipline, though it began with masturbation, carried over into other areas of their lives. The benefits of not masturbating, for many, are about the self-control and willpower to stop, even more so than the importance of not engaging in the act.
Increased Self-Esteem and Confidence
Masturbating on the regular can really zap someone’s self-esteem. How so? People become so entrenched in the act that they begin to believe, rightly or wrongly, that this is the best they can get.
Because masturbation and porn start to seem like better options than regular sex, for many, the frequency of sex with a partner decreases.
When masturbation is put on the back burner and sex in real life comes back into the picture, this can boost self-confidence. Not to mention, the feeling of control that you have over not masturbating can be a boost to confidence too!
Overall Improved Mental Health
All of this adds up to improved mental health overall. Many people report that when they stop masturbating, they just feel better. The extraction of guilt and shame, and the introduction of other hobbies and interests, can go a long way.
How Can I Stop Masturbating?
If you’re unsure how to stop but want to cut down or cut it out completely, we have some tips! Here are some ways to turn things around and stop excessively masturbating and watching porn.
Get Outside
We know it’s winter, and it’s not quite as easy to get outside as it might be in warmer weather. However, getting a little good old-fashioned vitamin D is a great way to feel better and find something else to do besides sitting on your couch thinking about you know what.
Hang Out With Friends
The solitary, isolated nature of masturbating means you may have cut ties with some friends. Or, perhaps you’ve just been blowing them off lately to stay home and watch porn instead of being social.
It might feel difficult at first to reach out if you have been distant, but if your friends are real ones, they’ll understand.
Keep Technology at Bay
One of the best ways to avoid masturbating is to avoid triggers. One of the main triggers is your computer (or maybe your phone).
You know that internet pornography is only a click away, so having your phone close by is a recipe for failure. There’s just no way you will have your laptop right next to your bed and not be tempted.
And you shouldn’t be expected to be perfect. So instead of trying, you should eliminate as much temptation as possible. Get an alarm clock to keep your phone in the living room at night.
If you don’t need to bring your laptop home from work, then don’t. Some people even advocate for a complete screen fast. It’s worth considering!
Conclusion
While masturbation may not be inherently bad for you, compulsively doing it to excess is. If you give it a break, you might notice some amazing benefits, like increased energy and libido, improved sexual relationships, and overall mental health.
If you are trying to stop but can’t, it might be time to reach out and get some help.
Sources:
Are there any benefits to taking a break from masturbating? | Healthy Male
Abstinence from Masturbation and Hypersexuality | PMC
Masturbation Addiction Treatment: Addiction Signs, Causes, And Withdrawal Symptoms | Lybrate